I'm trying so hard to understand my life right now. I'm trying to make some change for myself that will help me grow as a person but I'm having trouble sparkling right now. I've filled the past two days with the ballfield, basketball, and friends but still no sparkle.
I have enjoyed spending time at the ballfield with my family and hanging out with my friends but something is missing. Something important, something that I don't know how to get back. No matter what I do and how much fun it is I still miss her. It's like trying to live without part of me. How exactly is that supposed to work. Everybody says give some time it will get easier. I sure hope their right. I don't know if I will ever get used to not being snuggled up to her at night, having sweet pillow talk, or waking up to her sweet smile in the morning. Even the little things like hearing her in the kitchen in the mornings with her cup of coffee singing a little tune or talking to Sofee. God I miss my girls!
I know that I have to find my sparkle without them, but it seems so hard to live without a part of myself. Their is just something about her that makes me fell whole and I worry that although I may be able to shine on my own the sparkle has turned into a dull glimmer.
Taking one step at a time and trying to remember that saying: "That which does not kill us makes us stronger". I must continue to have faith, courage, and strength and hope that she will remember why she chose to love me to begin with!
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